old age

as I hadn't seen my mum for about 8 weeks I thought I would go up and make her sunday lunch for mothering sunday. I was in for a bit of a shock!. I know she is 'old' but she has changed so much in 8 weeks. She also knows it and doesn't like it as she has always been so independent and now she is needing much more help.

Speaking to my sister who lives nearest her afterwards, it became apparent that there is much I haven't known about and Hazel is having to cope with a lot really and I'm now wondering if there is anything I can do - even though I live 1 1/2 hours away.

It is quite sad seeing someone you love become old, someone you have always known as your parent starting to need 'parenting' and you start to prepare yourself for the inevitable and yet how can you... you start thinking of everything that person might miss out on, and then you start wanting to hang on, just like she is wanting to hang on to what she knows and loves.

today

its been a funny day, talking to students about all sorts of things, singing at the founders day service, chatting to staff and others at the lunch after. Then going and finishing off selection papers, and then chatting to so many people this evening on the phone about services that are coming up, frustrations with communications and then a friend chatting about what is going on her world, and then another friend on the phone all while trying to think about assembly tomorrow and all age service on sunday. No wonder my head is hurting!!

I think yesterday made me think a lot about stuff, as is the case when someone you know dies, it puts things into perspective and I guess that my priorities have changed over the years and my understanding of friendship is very different to what it used to be. I also know that my understanding of a lot of things is very different to even a few years ago, so that now where once I was quite fundamental in a lot of things, I am much more liberal. Christ met people where they were, he didn't insist they became like him, but that they loved God, and that they turned away from doing things that harmed them and others....

confused

sometimes there comes a point in your life, when you have had enough of something. You are left with options, 1)say nothing, do nothing 2) say or do something, and risk losing that something 3) don't say or do anything, and get yourself frustrated becasue you haven't said or done anything!!

so I have to make a choice... and at this moment in time I'm confused as this particular situation happens quite frequently, and I don't usually do anything about it, this time, I'm tempted to say something....

We were looking at bits of the sermon on the mount over the weekend in two separate places, and my challenge to those who were there, was 'how can you make a difference in your part of God's world at shcool, work, with your friends, church/youth group and at home'. I am trying to work through how I'm going to make a difference in this situation...